5 years is such a long time...

5 years. That's how long it takes to get a medical degree in Malaysia. That doesn't even include the one or two years of foundation in which you have to struggle, so that you could struggle again for another 5 years. Do you know what kind of things could happen in 5 years Morty?? If I had gotten married 5 years ago, I could have had a kid, or two by now. Or, I could have gotten married, then realise that the marriage life is not the life for me and I could have gotten a divorce. Then, I could have gone through a cathartic moment in which I realised that life is not worth living alone and I should find a partner to share my joys and my lows- in which case I would have found another person that understands my emotional baggage and I would remarry again. Crazy right? All that could have happened in 5 years.

Alas this is not fiction, this is life. And life is a thousand times infinity weirder than fiction. I was a bright eyed young boy when I started this journey, excited to face new challenges and overcome mountains of adversity. I had just aced my SPM with straight A's, flying colours and shit, and the world was my oyster. I had the opportunity to study abroad and boy was I on top of the world back then.

Fast forward 5 years, I feel as if life has chewed me up and spit me out in disgust. At 20 years old, I felt life was easy. But as I've mentioned before, life is bizarre. Many things happened which made me question reality. Imagine living for 22 years, and finding out that ice cream wasn't real. It turns out that ice cream is just a creamy fluid that the government uses to tame a generation of yes men. Yes, that's what happened to me. No, not the ice cream! But my reality, being shattered into a million pieces with a massive reveal so heartbreaking and enraging... It made me feel confused and sad, and frustrated that I wasn't able to understand this new reality. I won't go into it but I'm sure some of you can empathise with my feelings.

But of course, 5 years is a long time. Another 2 years passes after the reveal and I have started to accept this reality, because that's what you do in life. You're just a toilet, receiving SHIT and never being able to do anything about it. But the difference between me and a toilet, is that I have a mind, and mental strength is everything. It doesn't matter if you have the body of prime Arnold Schwazeneger, but if your mind is weak.... Nothing can be achieved. Though i may be a shit hole, but this shit hole want to change his situation and turn things around, using adversity as a way to be stronger. Whatever shit that life throws at me, I will use it to strengthen my will so that one day I will clog up and spray shit all over the walls.

5 years is such a long time... But in the context of a lifetime... 5 years is nothing.

I am near the end of my journey as a medical student, and by hook or by crook I will finish it strong-headedly. Pray for me and my friends :)

*Sorry for the shit metaphors (pun intended)

Comments

  1. Lex KamaruddinJune 25, 2020 at 11:01 PM

    ipannnn

    ReplyDelete
  2. nadiasyazwaniiiAugust 31, 2020 at 7:20 PM

    I dont know if this a relevance way to reach you, tapi applications to be someone in your life to open lagi ke? (I found it on twitter ��) i nak dm tak dapat sbb you tutup dm. So yeah ������

    ReplyDelete

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