Are you sure about this?- Kehidupan seorang pelajar perubatan.

Aku ingat lagi soalan yang mat saleh interviewer ni tanya masa aku nak sambung medik dulu. Are you sure about this decision? Then I would go on this heart-moving story of how I was inspired by the life of Tun M when he was a passionate and considerate Dr, how he made it a personal goal to help others that are less fortunate, and how God whispered to me that I could make a difference in the world! I remember it like it was 5 years ago :')

This man used to get on his bicycle and helped to treat people for free
 at their house bc they can't afford to go to the clinic. An inspiration.

Fast forward 5 years, I ask myself that question... EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

I think about it when I open my eyes 6 a.m. in the morning when my inner demons tell me to go back to sleep and skip class.

I think about it while I'm rempiting on my bike, mencelah like The Doctor on my way to the Hospital trying to avoid harassing these frickin BMs' sidemirrors with mine.

When my groupmate text me that the Dr's here

I think about it at 1.30 pm when the Dr. teaching us keeps drawling on even tho we've been standing for 5 hours and I'm lowkey hypoglycaemic and wondering how if I fainted my group mates would regard me as a hero because I' d cut the teaching short... Ohh I love that vision.

I think about it all the time.

This road is frickin tough man. One day I feel like 'shiiit I've got this medical student thingy together!' and the next day I'd think 'fuuuckk aku bodoh lagi' as these waves of endless new information drown me. Damn this shit is hard man. Everyday I feel like all odds are against me, reminding me how naive I was back then thinking that I could breeze past med school. How I used to think 'How hard could it be?'. But nowadays Drs be telling me 'This is bread and butter! You should know this!

The thing is, EVERYTHING is MOTHER EFFIN bread and butter! Where's the frickin strawberry jam man?? I got acne from all that butter.

Damn I miss that ignorance and arrogance you know. That arrogance you got when you scored your SPM. That feeling like 'Ekeleh kalau SPM aku boleh SEMUA aku boleh.' I need that energy back man. Cause nowadays sometimes I feel like I wanna take culinary and just make food and turn those starving frowns upside down. That's a nice thought :')

Even Drs don't want you to be Drs! That's how tough it is. You know they be like 'Why you take medic? Study is hell even when you work it's gonna be hell.' Damn these Drs be begging for us to quit like we stealing their jobs :p

But it's okay man. I feel it's tough, but I'm already 4 years in and Ive only got an Rm700000 loan to pay back if I quit so it's not like I have any other way out. So I just gotta grow some balls :')

Any road you choose, any path you're on it's gonna be hard. As long as we're on this temporary world, it'll always be a struggle. Damn even the richest and most famous people have problems right. Even R. Kelly who believed he could fly couldn't help himself from pissing on kids right. Damnnn.

At the end of the day, and this applies to everyone, no matter what happens on this journey, REMEMBER WHY YOU STARTED. Get back to your old naive romantic ways and keep dreaming man, but act on that dream. Focus on your goals, whether it be to make your mother happy or to make those dollar billz, or to just be fulfilled by helping others, keep on going! There is no one that could help you more than you can help yourself :)

Shit, I better start on my case report that's due tomorrow.

Peace.